Broken dreams16 januari 2017
Every time you lied
I died a little
Little by little I crumbled
Maybe I never told you nothing cause I didn't trust you
Maybe I never trusted you because you couldn't be trusted
The truth is you can't take the good times away
But why does it always have to end this way?
Every time you lied
I died a litle
But I just kept trying
In the end
I just kept crying
Commercialised activism9 november 2016
I always feld great admiration when I see people in newspapers that enter official buildings and take action against injustice. At least they do something I always thought. I myself am more someone who would ocupy a house or march on the street, hoping that will change something. Squat a house against the corrupt housing market, boycot a product from a corrupt country, speak to everyone and everywhere about the injustice done in this world. Trying to spread the word. Connecting with as many groups as possible....
Exposing myself in the newspapers or bragging about what I've done never occured to me. You do things because you believe in them, because the things you do that is what you are.
But like I said, whenever I saw a picture online or anywhere about an action that exposed people in power I had great admiration. So about two years ago I decided to join one of those groups. Stimulated by an american writer ''activist''. I feld all my activities so far didn't really change a thing, the system in the west was and still is getting more and more fascist, inhumane and anti social everyday, so I thought radical action was the right thing to do!
One of the things that did bother me most at that time and still bothers me most, is the inhumanity with wich people speak about the wars world wide. So my choise was an eassy one, I joined a peace group. A peace group that does the kind of actions you see on the internet and in the newspapers. That might change something I was hoping.
Unfortunatly things didn't go as what I hoped for. First of all all the actions I did with them didn't make it in the news....:-(
It did get me in jail, but not in the news....So nobody knew about our actions....
It did give them a kick I supose, I only feld disapointed...
The american writer ''activist'' writer on the other hand turned out to be a pretty self-centered agressive man. Obviously selling books and being the most clever guy was more important to him than the things he claimed to stand for. Ego kills a man. Americans are very weak in that way, a little bit of attention and they go up in their ''public figure'' ''Mister celebrity'' cloud. It's the system that makes us weak, and the harder the system, the weaker we get.
Also he turned out to be just like the system he pretended to despise. He hates anarchist but is still using naive anarchist groups today to promote his books. That's like a racist using black people to get to the top.... How can I trust a men like that?
As if that wasn't enough to feel down, the Belgium peace group I was with,decided to start a new group in Brugge. The person they put in charge of that group is the wife of an army colonel.Yes, I can hear you all fall of you chair to. Not an army colonel who quit the army after he found out the army in the west is just being used since the second world war for commercial purpose....no no no...an army colonel who never had an other job beside this one and who is hoping to get a nice job in the Green 'left' party of Belgium after he retires to put a bit of extra money on his 'low' pension.
Cause besides money making and political career seeking I really can't see any other reason for her and him being involved with this new peace group.
How can I trust a 'peace' group like that?
I always thought people like the writer and the leaders of the peace group had big ego's, but now I'm older I think it goes deeper than that. I think it would be pretty honest to just call it commercialised acivism. I saw this in politics, and now I see it, with tears in my eyes, in so called ''activist'' groups. People who join a group like that just to set up a nice career as a writer or pollitician. I can understand some activist become writers or politicians, but if you enter a group like that just to become one of the two you are so damn rotten...
It made me come back to my old self. Activism is something you do because that is what you are. No mather how small your actions may be, as long as there is a fight, there will be future. as long as the word gets spread, there will be a change. A change in the future generations, a change in society.
Down with commercial activism!
Long live sincere activism :-)
Western Man13 september 2016
Western man still hasn't learned a thing.
Treating the whole world as if he's king.
Destroying every culture with their violence and hate.
Killing plants and animals, behaving just like canibals
We have to stop this lunatic before it is to late.
Western man has no respect for me!
Western man has no respect for you!
Indiginous are fighting to protect their holy land.
Wisdom of the ancient days should never be forgotten!
Indiginous and tribal life should have never been downtrodden!
Western man just doesn't want to show,
that they're letting deadly poison flow
Into the oceans, into tho the streams
Into the water destroying what life means
Let's stand side by side
Indiginous and white
Asian and black
To claim our lives back!
Vuck you violent mothervuckers ;-)30 augustus 2016
Last week monday was the day my f became a v....One of my front teeth had to be pulled. Two people knocked it out of my mouth violently about 27 and 28 years ago. The first time it was placed back right after it happened but the second time it took several hours before it was placed back.
Anyway, after all those years the tooth totaly died of, became black and started to collapse. I cried when it was knocked out and i cried when it was pulled last week.
I hate those mothervuckers that did it, but life doesn't always go as you would like. And some things can't be changed. And this, I can't change it....
Because of the emotional state I was in this week, remembering bad memories, I thought once more about pacifism. I am opposed to war, militarism and violence, but always refered to myself as an aggressive pacifist. I know that people and systems who make war use selfdefence as an excuse to fight dirty fights and kill innocent people, but that doesn't mean you can condemn every violent action done by an individual as bad.
We are after all, just animals. If you get hurt or treatened, it is only natural to fight back. Not fighting back is unhealthy. Attacking people without reason is unhealthy to! People who go around beating people without reason are sick! But if you get beaten by someone, you should beat them back! And if they are to strong for you, run like Bruce Lee adviced. No fight is always better than a fight he said.
Most intelectuals and pacifist don't agree with that. They think hitting back if for ignorant and stupid people. They even dare to say it is primitive. But from what i've seen, not hitting back creates an unatural frustration in people and on the long run, those same people could become sadistic and cruel. Being sadistic and cruel might not be direct violence and cause no physical harm, but the mental damage can be huge. Some people who don't fight back will just become depressed and sad for life, never being able to live a normal life...
Our emotional wellbeing is important to. And if we don't react in a natural way to external things like being beaten up or being bullied we'll become frustrated. And it is exactly that frustration most pacifist avoid to talk about...
I have great respect for ex army people who join the anti war movement. They show that people can change. They also learned from experience that war is a dirty business.The thing that makes a person clever is the fact that he dares to admit he was wrong. People who never admit they were wrong, a lot of high schooled people are like that, can't be clever in my opinion.
In a kind of way I do feel some forms of pacifism are simular to the attitude of a coward. How can one just stand by and do nothing? Praying that that will end the so called vicious circle of violence... It's like hoping for a miracle to happen...
I do believe if all soldiers would trow down their weapons war would end, but I also believe that it is natural and normal to defend myself and the people I like if the soldiers and violent people who don't believe in that point their fist or gun at me...
Can a person who hates people love animals?20 juli 2016
It must have been a couple of days ago I had a huge fight with a woman I knew for about two years or more. it isn't the first fight i had with her but it will definitely will be the last.
She is 62 years old and takes care over rejected dogs. She has 4 dogs herselve and temporarely adopted dogs over the past 6 or 8 years. Usealy she is a person who will crie when she sees injustice done to animals and above all she condems the human race.
Humans are evil, expecialy men are evil she used to say. Men are the cause of every problem in this world, because men are sick bastards who stuck us poor woman into this world of patriarchy and hate.
Whenever I talked about changing the system we live in she used to end the conversation saying i was naive and that all humans are evil and therefore there is no solution.
I used to feel sorry for her and only got involved with here again after she had a big fight with my oldest daughter and husband because she ended up in this disgusting fight with her male neighbour. He did punch her in the face 3 times and I felt extremely guilty and bad about that.
How can a men beat an older woman on her face? What kind of a men does that? Bloody bastard! And how could I have broken up with her after she went extremely agressive to my oldest daughter and husband. Maybe I overeacted? I couldn't just let this happen in this village. Why didn't anyone help her? What a sexist and cruel world we live in...
So I decided to go and visit her alone. Every week once or twice. We used to talk a lot, and especially when we talked about this world we live in she used to come to the same point over and over again. People are assholes she used to say a lot. Animals are a lot better. Her dogs mend the world to her.She saved those poor creatures.
Only last time I visited her something went wrong. I picked her up to walk our dogs and while we were driving she started talking about the terrorist attack in Nice. I subconciously felt this was weird because she talked about it when i phoned and now she was going on about it again as if her whole life collapsed. I answered her that I find it shamefull that Europe and France will use this attack to send more army and weapons to this dirty war so than she exploded. She wanted to go back home straight away so i turned the car around. While i was driving back she insulted me the whole time. I wasn't that amazed because i saw this side of her before when she was fighting with my daughter and husband.
The only thing that did amaze me and did brake my heart was that when i stopped in front of her house she opened the cardoor and took one of her dogs by the neck and trew the poor animal out as hard as she could. The poor dog did fly out. The other dogs were to scared to get out and started hiding behind me sniffing and licking my neck. I wanted to drive of with the dogs in the back just to save them, that;s how I feld. She came to the other side of the car and dragged the other dogs out.
I just still can't believe it. An animal lover turned evil. Just like an animal right activist I used to mail with for several months that turned out to be evil to.
But i know know what it is. Both had this deep hate against humans, and maybe the truth is, that if you hate humans you hate yourself, and if you hate yourself you can't really love, not even animals. Maybe they use animals as a substitute for the love they can't give to themselves, but it doesn't mean they are animal lovers.
I supose a treu animal lover loves himself/herself and the people that suround them. So next time I meet someone who goes on about how much they hate people but how deeply they love animals I'll take a deep breath an run away.....
Raising awareness26 juni 2016
I suppose one golden rule towarths understanding. and tollerance is admiting your own ignorance. No one is perfect, no one knows all and you learn every day.
This morning an article about the Belgium labour union and a conversation with a colleague made me remember that when I started working in a factory picking musschrooms when I was 22, I didn't join the labour union there because i didn't knew what a labour union was. The woman who was in charge never told me what it was and when i asked them why they joined no one could tell me. they actualy reacted real scared when I told them I wasn't a member because they just thought it was obligated to be a member....
There I was, 22 years old, an annarchist for 10 years, against the system, against the queen, against the police, against the army....but no idea what a labour union was....
Instead of focussing on my own ignorance, I was just focusing on the ignorance of the woman who was representing the labour union. How stupid she was, not even knowing what she was representing.
The truth is, I was stupid to, because I didn't knew what a labour union was. We were both stupid, and young, and a little ignorant....
We really need to understand and educate the youth and ourselves for a brighter future. Ignorance is the key to everything wrong these days. How can you know people in other countries are being exploited and abused for the wealth of just a few if no one tells you? How can you know our food is unhealthy and full of poison if no one tells you? How can you know what a labour union is if no one tells you?
Raising awareness is still the key to changes. People who are not aware just don't know. Not that they don't want toknow, it's just...no one has told them...yet...So lets tell them!
The annoying capitalist environmentalist/animal activist31 mei 2016
I just went to an environmentalist/animal activist site of someone I used to like. After reading some of the comments on the site my blood started boiling of anger. Anger because of the annoying things some of them said.
One of the people asked or it wasn't capitalism that destroyed the environment. Another person answered saying that greed and all that has nothing to do with the economical system, and that capitalism, socialism and communisme are all the same....Instead of defending his question the person who asked or it was capitalism that destroys all, just agreed with the answer....
I know I would have answered saying that greed and selfishness lays at the root of capitalism, and even knowing socialism and communism aren't perfect, they are far less destructive than capitalism...for human beings, animals and nature....But then again, who am I ? If I would answer on the site I would probably be blocked, because the person who runs the site apparently likes people like these...
People with weak oppinions and little faith in what they believe themselves....
Ofcourse there was another person saying that all the problems would be solved if there were just less people, overpopulation is the problem. With this he did put himself on the same line as Microsoft super capitalist Bill Gates....bravo!
It made me think of a line I did read a day ago in a book about Lenin and Feminism. It was about middle class people around 1904...
The woman's magazine29 april 2016
This morning I ended up reading into a woman's magazine. It was laying on the table in a waiting room so I thought it was one of the magazines they put there to keep you bussy. The first article was about why woman don't negotiate about theyr wage. Men always do it said. They also claimed that if you don't aim high from the beginning you'll never jump up. Men always aim high from the beginning....I was slightly pissed of reading just some of the main points. MOST woman (and men) don't get to negotiate their wage, most people just get offered so much an hour and that's it....Take it or fuck off...Only a few get to negotiate, most of us don't...
The next article was an interview with a white woman around her 50s or somethinng, and a black woman around her 30s or something....The white woman claimed that the wage gap between men and woman would be only 2 % and not 12% if woman would go working full time instead of part time....and the black woman claimed that immigrants should accept woman on the street more....I skipped trought this article the same way I skipped trought the one before this. If a woman gets paid less an hour than a men for the same job, I don't really believe this woman makes any sence by saying bullshit like that. And in all the foreign neigbourhoods I lived in, I never really feld woman were kept indoors and didn't join the streetlife....so there goes number two....Maybe black woman are only allowed to speak in this kind of bullshit magazines if they confirm our western point of view about how sexist those dark skin people are. We, the white european on the other side, are so open minded with our exesive number of pedophiles and rape and physical and emotional abuse....
The last article I checked had something to do with vaginas, so I supose it was about sex,,,cause yeah, the ambitious woman is verry obsessed with her vagina, just like a men who is obsessed with his dick Then a woman looked at me. I realised the magazine wasn't part of the collection from the waiting room, but hers. I apologised and left the stupid magazine to her.
I wondered what kind of woman she was, what kind of job she had. I wondered.....
Ambitious men27 maart 2016
Ambitious men .....................................
Does whatever it takes................
Doesn't care or he hurts or who's heart he breaks........
His smiles are so fake.......................
His words just made up to please you...................
And yet every time again...................
You're taken in by their fake kindness................
Feeling stupid by your own blindness............
And when you fall down like a rock.........................
When you realised and woke up...................
Again and again.......................
You were fooled by ambitious men..........
Meaningless me/you24 maart 2016
Just think about the fact, that your oppinion doesn't mean a thing. The things you thought about and talked about, the experiences you've had and the analyses you've made, won't stand, just because it is you who came up with it...
Only the oppinions and analyses that are published and thaught, in official institutions like schools and universities, and by official magazines and newspapers are accepted. And in those institutions only people who base their oppinion on existing oppinions get accepted....So there is actualy no freedom to think something else...whatever they, the ones in charge of what is thaught and what is published, pretend....
You as an individual don't mean a thing, unless you say what they want you to say, so you confirm the rightness of the so called ''majority" Of the so called intelectual know it all crowd, that can prove their inteligence by a piece of paper given to them after they confirmed that the institution that gave them the papaer is right.
Because if you don't agree with what they teach you, you don't get your paper....Because there again the rule is...Meaningless you....
A ''majority'' that only gives us a few oppinions to choose from, and biljons of people can choose from those few recognised theories and oppinions....whoever thinks different is wrong, crazy or backwards and will be expelled.....
Always speak the tollerated oppinion...meaningless you!
Well fuck this shit, you are beautifull, and your oppinion is strong and worthy!
Every brain os worthy, every person is worthy